A paranormal investigative group in Connecticut were called to a haunted house. The homeowners warned the group that the house was haunted by an especially "evil" spirit that enjoyed playing pranks. The team leader of the paranormal society invited a friend from Massachusetts to come along. He was a physicist and an amateur paranormal investigator, who everyone called "Doc." Doc believed that there were no such things as ghosts or poltergeists, and that every type of haunting or unusual phenomenon had a reasonable, earthly explanation.
The group traveled across the State of Connecticut in three vehicles filled with team members and equipment. Upon arriving at the home, the team immediately started setting up the monitoring equipment as the team leader and his friend, Doc, toured the home with the homeowner.
At one point of the tour, when the three men approached the staircase that led to the second floor, they heard very loud footsteps on the upstairs landing.
"Is anyone else home?" Doc asked the homeowner.
"No, my wife's at work and we have no kids," the homeowner replied.
Excited to have his first opportunity to confront an alleged ghostly spirit, Doc walked to the foot of the stairs.
"Come on! You can do better than that you lousy ghost!" Doc yelled up the stairwell.
"Doc, I wouldn't do that if I were you," the paranormal team leader advised, but Doc ignored him. Instead, he stepped up onto the bottom step.
"If you're a ghost, why don't you show us what you can really do, you lousy, no-good prankster!" Doc yelled.
The moment the last word came out of his mouth, his pants fell down around his ankles. The homeowner and the team leader burst into laughter as Doc, terrified, struggled to pull his pants back up. He then stumbled as fast as he could out the front door of the house. He refused to re-enter the house or to talk about the incident ever again. However, the event went down in the records as one of the most humorous moments the paranormal team had ever witnessed in a haunted home. They still tell this funny ghost story to every new team member.
CERITA LUCU - FUNNY STORY
KUMPULAN CERITA PENDEK LUCU
11/02/2016
10/30/2016
Two People Are Killed
There are two dead people were asked the guardian angel gate before going to the afterlife.
Angel : Why are you here?
Person 1 : "When I was at the office, I was told the neighbor that my wife
was having an affair with another man in my apartment.
Therefore I immediately raced home. Up at my house
tossed around the room looking for the man. Angry,
I threw what I found out the window, including suitcases
available at the bedside. I was so emotional I get hit
the heart. "
Angel : "And you?" (ask the angels to the second)
Person 2 : "Hhh ... I was in a suitcase that had been dumped .."
Ada dua orang yang sudah mati ditanya malaikat penjaga gerbang sebelum masuk ke alam baka.
Malaikat: Kenapa kamu ada di sini?
Orang 1: "Sewaktu saya dikantor, saya diberitahu tetangga kalau istri
saya sedang berselingkuh dengan laki-laki lain di apartemen saya.
Karena itu saya langsung ngebut pulang. Sampai di rumah saya
obrak-abrik seluruh kamar mencari laki-laki itu. Marah nggak ketemu,
saya lempar apa saja yang saya temukan keluar jendela, termasuk koper
yang ada di samping tempat tidur. Saking emosinya saya kena serangan
jantung."
Malaikat: "Kalau kamu?" (tanya malaikat ke orang kedua)
Orang 2: "Hhh… saya ada di dalam koper yang dibuang tadi.."
Angel : Why are you here?
Person 1 : "When I was at the office, I was told the neighbor that my wife
was having an affair with another man in my apartment.
Therefore I immediately raced home. Up at my house
tossed around the room looking for the man. Angry,
I threw what I found out the window, including suitcases
available at the bedside. I was so emotional I get hit
the heart. "
Angel : "And you?" (ask the angels to the second)
Person 2 : "Hhh ... I was in a suitcase that had been dumped .."
Ada dua orang yang sudah mati ditanya malaikat penjaga gerbang sebelum masuk ke alam baka.
Malaikat: Kenapa kamu ada di sini?
Orang 1: "Sewaktu saya dikantor, saya diberitahu tetangga kalau istri
saya sedang berselingkuh dengan laki-laki lain di apartemen saya.
Karena itu saya langsung ngebut pulang. Sampai di rumah saya
obrak-abrik seluruh kamar mencari laki-laki itu. Marah nggak ketemu,
saya lempar apa saja yang saya temukan keluar jendela, termasuk koper
yang ada di samping tempat tidur. Saking emosinya saya kena serangan
jantung."
Malaikat: "Kalau kamu?" (tanya malaikat ke orang kedua)
Orang 2: "Hhh… saya ada di dalam koper yang dibuang tadi.."
10/23/2016
funny short stories
Elderly Couple
An elderly husband and wife visit their doctor when they begin forgetting little things. Their doctor tells them that many people find it useful to write themselves little notes.
When they get home, the wife says, “Dear, will you please go to the kitchen and get me a dish of ice cream? And maybe write that down so you won’t forget?”
“Nonsense,” says the husband, “I can remember a dish of ice cream.”
“Well,” says the wife, “I’d also like some strawberries and whipped cream on it.” “My memory’s not all that bad,” says the husband. “No problem — a dish of ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream. I don’t need to write it down.”
He goes into the kitchen; his wife hears pots and pans banging around. The husband finally emerges from the kitchen and presents his wife with a plate of bacon and eggs.
She looks at the plate and asks, “Hey, where’s the toast I asked for?”
The Ugliest Baby
One day a woman was waiting for a bus. It comes and she walks in and the bus driver says “Wow, that is the ugliest baby I have ever seen!”
So the women sits down and she says to the man next to her “The bus driver just insulted me!”
The man says “You go talk to him, just go, l’ll hold your monkey for you”.
A Missing Person
Recently, a distraught wife went to the local police station, along with her next-door neighbor, to report that her husband was missing. The policeman asked for a description of the missing man.
The wife said, “He is 35 years old, 6-foot 4-inches, has dark eyes, dark wavy hair, an athletic build, weighs 185 pounds, is soft-spoken, and is good to the children.”
The next-door neighbor protested, “Your husband is 5-foot 8-inches, chubby, bald, has a big mouth, and is mean to your children.”
The wife replied, “Yes, but who wants HIM back?”
China Product
A Nigerian lady married a Chinese guy. They had a baby girl but after 3 months the baby died.
The mother of the Nigerian lady came to visit them, but she was just shouting; "I knew it! I knew it! I knew it!"
A neighbor noticed her shouting then called her outside and asked her what and she replied; "I knew that China products do not last long!!!"
10/11/2016
Really?
In the classes, there are two student are studying a history class. They are so confused to facing the next paper task that must be submitted to the teacher tomorrow.
Patrick: Have you done the task of history class?
Sandye: Yes, I have.
Patrick: Really?
Sandye: Yeah, I had been looking for the materials in the google.
Patrick:Does the google street so far from here? If yes, I don’t want to go there, it is so tiring!
Sandye; Hah? What the….
FUNNY SHORT STORIES
TEACHER
Teacher: “Here is a math problem. If your dad earned $300 dollars a week and he gave your mother half, what should he have?”
Student: “A heart attack.”
HAPPY NEW YEAR
in some condition, there are a 3 men would spent a new year by their own, they have a conversation:
Raju: Michael, Patrick, where you wanna go in new year night?
Michael(Have a girl): I will go to the beach and burn the fire works with my girl.
Patrick(LDR): I will go to the beach and burn fire works and send it to my girls by Instagram
Raju: Wow, fantastic!
Michael: And you raju?
Raju(Single): I will go to the beach and burn my ex-girl’s photos and be crying!
Michael and Raju: What The…… (-.-)
LITTLE BOY
A little boy asked his father: “Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?”
The father replied: “I don’t know son, I’m still paying.”
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Teacher: “Here is a math problem. If your dad earned $300 dollars a week and he gave your mother half, what should he have?”
Student: “A heart attack.”
HAPPY NEW YEAR
in some condition, there are a 3 men would spent a new year by their own, they have a conversation:
Raju: Michael, Patrick, where you wanna go in new year night?
Michael(Have a girl): I will go to the beach and burn the fire works with my girl.
Patrick(LDR): I will go to the beach and burn fire works and send it to my girls by Instagram
Raju: Wow, fantastic!
Michael: And you raju?
Raju(Single): I will go to the beach and burn my ex-girl’s photos and be crying!
Michael and Raju: What The…… (-.-)
LITTLE BOY
A little boy asked his father: “Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?”
The father replied: “I don’t know son, I’m still paying.”
ANEKDOT
PENYAKIT HILANG
Nama saya Aliang. Saya menderita penyakit kelamin sudah 5 (lima) tahun tidak sembuh sembuh. Setelah saya berobat ke klinik TONG SENG (sering iklan di TV). Sekarang kelamin saya langsung Hilang. Sekarang saya sudah sembuh tidak punya kelamin lagi. Terima kasih klinik TONG SENG. Nama saya sekarang Aling!
FILM HANTU
Engkong lagi kesal dengan TVnya. Putar channel 1 filmnya Si manis Jembatan Ancol…, channel 2 Hantu Manggarai…, channel 3 Malam Jumat Kliwon…, channel 4 Kuntilanak…
Si Engkong teriak ke Mamad pembantunya: “Mad..antena parabola menghadap mana?”
Jawab Mamad: “Ke Kuburan kong !!”
Kata Engkong: busyet deh, pantes aje … “coba loe arahin ke Mangga Besar, siapa tau bisa nonton STRIPTIS…!
BULE VS ORANG KITA
Berikut sebuah wawancara per-telepon antara seorang bule dgn org Indonesia…
Bule: “What is your last name?”
Orang Indo: “I’m sorry.”
Bule: “You don’t have to sorry.. And what is your first name?”
Orang Indo: “You don’t know.”
Bule: “Off course I don’t know, that’s why I ask you… And your middle name?”
Orang Indo: “Funny…”
Akhirnya bulenya marah & menutup telepon.
Org Indonesia-nya kebingungan, sambil memandangi nama di KTP-nya sendiri: “Yudono Fani Amsori”.
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Nama saya Aliang. Saya menderita penyakit kelamin sudah 5 (lima) tahun tidak sembuh sembuh. Setelah saya berobat ke klinik TONG SENG (sering iklan di TV). Sekarang kelamin saya langsung Hilang. Sekarang saya sudah sembuh tidak punya kelamin lagi. Terima kasih klinik TONG SENG. Nama saya sekarang Aling!
FILM HANTU
Engkong lagi kesal dengan TVnya. Putar channel 1 filmnya Si manis Jembatan Ancol…, channel 2 Hantu Manggarai…, channel 3 Malam Jumat Kliwon…, channel 4 Kuntilanak…
Si Engkong teriak ke Mamad pembantunya: “Mad..antena parabola menghadap mana?”
Jawab Mamad: “Ke Kuburan kong !!”
Kata Engkong: busyet deh, pantes aje … “coba loe arahin ke Mangga Besar, siapa tau bisa nonton STRIPTIS…!
BULE VS ORANG KITA
Berikut sebuah wawancara per-telepon antara seorang bule dgn org Indonesia…
Bule: “What is your last name?”
Orang Indo: “I’m sorry.”
Bule: “You don’t have to sorry.. And what is your first name?”
Orang Indo: “You don’t know.”
Bule: “Off course I don’t know, that’s why I ask you… And your middle name?”
Orang Indo: “Funny…”
Akhirnya bulenya marah & menutup telepon.
Org Indonesia-nya kebingungan, sambil memandangi nama di KTP-nya sendiri: “Yudono Fani Amsori”.
10/03/2016
HAL YANG LOGIS
Ada dua orang gadis, satu cara berpikirnya MATEMATIS (M) dan yg satu cara berpikirnya mengandalkan LOGIKA (L) . Mereka berdua berjalan pulang lewat jalan gelap dan jarak rumah mereka masih jauh. Setelah beberapa lama berjalan..
M : Apakah kamu juga memperhatikan, ada seorang pria yg mengikuti kita kira2 sejak 38 menit lalu? Saya khawatir dia bermaksud jelek.
L : Itu hal Logis. Dia ingin memperkosa kita.
M : Oh tidak, dengan kecepatan berjalan kita seperti ini, dalam waktu 15 menit dia akan menangkap kita. Apa yg harus kita lakukan?
L : Hanya ada 1 cara logis yang harus kita lakukan yaitu berjalan lebih cepat.
M : Itu tidak banyak membantu
L : Tentu saja itu tidak membantu, Logikanya kalau kita berjalan lebih cepat dia juga akan mempercepat jalannya.
M : Lalu, apa yang harus kita lakukan? Dengan kecepatan kita ini dia akan menangkap kita dalam waktu 2,5 menit
L : Hanya ada 1 langkah Logis yang harus kita lakukan.. Kamu lewat kiri dan aku lewat kanan sehingga dia tak bisa mengikuti kita berdua.
Setelah kedua gadis itu berpisah, ternyata Pria tadi mengikuti langkah si gadis yang menggunakan logika . Gadis M tiba di rumah dan dia khawatir akan keselamatan sahabatnya. Tapi, tidak berapa lama Gadis L datang.
M : Oh terima kasih Tuhan.. Kamu tiba dengan selamat. Eh, gimana pengalamanmu tadi?
L : Setelah kita berpisah dia mengikuti aku terus.
M : Ya.. ya.. Tapi apa yg terjadi kemudian dengan kamu?
L : Sesuai dengan logika saya langsung lari sekuat tenaga dan Pria itupun juga lari sekuat tenaga mengejar saya.
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M : Dan… dan..
L : Sesuai dengan logika dia berhasil mendekati saya di tempat yang gelap
M : Lalu.. Apa yang kamu lakukan?
L : Hanya ada satu hal logis yg dapat saya lakukan, yaitu mengangkat rok saya..
M : Oh… Lalu apa yg dilakukan pria tadi?
L : Sesuai dengan logika dia menurunkan celananya
M : Oh tidak… Lalu apa yg terjadi kemudian?
L : Hal yg logis bukan, kalau gadis yg mengangkat roknya larinya lebih cepat dari pada lelaki yang berlari sambil memelorotkan celananya
IPAD TABLET
Seorang gadis ABG datang ke toko HP mau membeli Tablet PC.
Gadis ABG: Berapa harga iPad itu mba’?
Penjual HP: 6 juta
Gadis ABG: Kalau harga iPad 2 ?
Penjual HP: 8 juta
Gadis ABG:Kalau Galaxy Tab 1 yang itu ?
Penjual HP: 3 juta
Gadis ABG:Mmmm … yang Galaxy 2 ?
Penjual HP: Kalau itu 5 juta
Gadis ABG:Waaah mahal ya? Ada tablet yang murah?
Penjual HP: Ada, PARAMEX Rp. 2.500,- dapat 4 tablet
M : Apakah kamu juga memperhatikan, ada seorang pria yg mengikuti kita kira2 sejak 38 menit lalu? Saya khawatir dia bermaksud jelek.
L : Itu hal Logis. Dia ingin memperkosa kita.
M : Oh tidak, dengan kecepatan berjalan kita seperti ini, dalam waktu 15 menit dia akan menangkap kita. Apa yg harus kita lakukan?
L : Hanya ada 1 cara logis yang harus kita lakukan yaitu berjalan lebih cepat.
M : Itu tidak banyak membantu
L : Tentu saja itu tidak membantu, Logikanya kalau kita berjalan lebih cepat dia juga akan mempercepat jalannya.
M : Lalu, apa yang harus kita lakukan? Dengan kecepatan kita ini dia akan menangkap kita dalam waktu 2,5 menit
L : Hanya ada 1 langkah Logis yang harus kita lakukan.. Kamu lewat kiri dan aku lewat kanan sehingga dia tak bisa mengikuti kita berdua.
Setelah kedua gadis itu berpisah, ternyata Pria tadi mengikuti langkah si gadis yang menggunakan logika . Gadis M tiba di rumah dan dia khawatir akan keselamatan sahabatnya. Tapi, tidak berapa lama Gadis L datang.
M : Oh terima kasih Tuhan.. Kamu tiba dengan selamat. Eh, gimana pengalamanmu tadi?
L : Setelah kita berpisah dia mengikuti aku terus.
M : Ya.. ya.. Tapi apa yg terjadi kemudian dengan kamu?
L : Sesuai dengan logika saya langsung lari sekuat tenaga dan Pria itupun juga lari sekuat tenaga mengejar saya.
M : Dan… dan..
L : Sesuai dengan logika dia berhasil mendekati saya di tempat yang gelap
M : Lalu.. Apa yang kamu lakukan?
L : Hanya ada satu hal logis yg dapat saya lakukan, yaitu mengangkat rok saya..
M : Oh… Lalu apa yg dilakukan pria tadi?
L : Sesuai dengan logika dia menurunkan celananya
M : Oh tidak… Lalu apa yg terjadi kemudian?
L : Hal yg logis bukan, kalau gadis yg mengangkat roknya larinya lebih cepat dari pada lelaki yang berlari sambil memelorotkan celananya
IPAD TABLET
Seorang gadis ABG datang ke toko HP mau membeli Tablet PC.
Gadis ABG: Berapa harga iPad itu mba’?
Penjual HP: 6 juta
Gadis ABG: Kalau harga iPad 2 ?
Penjual HP: 8 juta
Gadis ABG:Kalau Galaxy Tab 1 yang itu ?
Penjual HP: 3 juta
Gadis ABG:Mmmm … yang Galaxy 2 ?
Penjual HP: Kalau itu 5 juta
Gadis ABG:Waaah mahal ya? Ada tablet yang murah?
Penjual HP: Ada, PARAMEX Rp. 2.500,- dapat 4 tablet
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